Written by Isabela Lima, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Boa Vista - Roraima, Brazil
In 2017, I had to experience grief in a heavy way—heavier than I thought I could handle. We had participated in a spiritual retreat in February where the theme was “Be Strong and Courageous.” And I needed to be.
In May of that year, we received the devastating news that my brother-in-law had passed away suddenly and unfairly. That news tore at the heart of my husband and his family.
I saw him suffering. Everything around us was tears and pain.
Someone he loved dearly had passed away.
It was then that I began to see the great love God had, and still has, for us—His care despite everything. The church cared for us and held us like children who needed to cry in someone's arms.
The pain was immense. The whole city was moved by this horrible thing that had happened.
And seeing my loved ones in that situation, I prayed to God to transfer to me at least a little of what I saw them feeling.
What I didn't know was that a few months later, I would suffer exactly the same thing.
Now it was my brother who had passed away. And I felt completely immersed in a cloud of grief. Once again, the Lord's Church embraced us, and we were cared for with great love. The church cared for us, and we cared for our family.
Grief is dark and incredibly painful. Church services became a place where we simply cried.
But, behind all the pain, a strange (for that moment) feeling of gratitude filled me—not because of what had happened, but because I could feel the powerful hand of someone caring for me in the midst of my affliction. Furthermore, I felt the inheritance of an earthly family, better known as the Church of the Lord, which was completely at my side.
My awakening to serve God more happened after this experience. Through it, I realized that I was a Christian, but I hadn’t been dedicating to the Lord everything I could or should have. So, instead of clinging to the pain, I clung to the idea that I could serve God better, surrender my life to Him, and prepare myself so that, when I saw others going through the same thing, I could help them in some way.
This process was also a form of healing from grief. Serving God, growing closer to Him, and becoming more involved in the work of the church strengthened me. If it weren't for that, I wouldn't be in Boa Vista, serving others today. I understand that everything is subject to the Lord's permission and that there is a purpose in all things. What we need to do is decide from which angle we're going to look: whether it's just the problem itself or how God works through it. After all, in John 16:33, Jesus said that in this world we will have trouble, but to take heart!
I think about this often. It was a trial that made me more mature in clinging to God and trusting my Father, who always knows what's best for me. At no point did I want to take it out on the Lord or question why I was going through this. On the contrary, I wanted to go to His feet, cry when necessary, help those who needed me, and learn to be more present in the church, to work better, and to serve more.
Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. (1Th 5:18 NIV)
“Give thanks.”: Grief changed me, but it didn’t mold me into its dark pattern of pain. It was through it that I grew even closer to my Heavenly Father.
“In all circumstances”: Even if I lose my family, God is with me, and His promise that one day I will be with Him, living in heaven, is what drives me to long for Him in this life.
After all, who will separate me from the love of God revealed in Christ our Lord?
