Written by Deanna Brooks, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Searcy, AR.
Working with others in a group can be a prickly situation at times, especially if one or two have the tendency to take charge. Recently I was reading through a journal and came upon some memories where I wrote this scripture:
“If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all” (Romans 12:18).
We were a close-knit group of mothers who had worked well together on many events as our children grew up. This meeting was to plan one of the biggest events of their school year experiences.
The mother who had asked me to chair the meeting said she wanted to say something first, so with my “OK,” she and another mother took over.
Our events had always been planned by group discussion and sometimes a vote, but these two mothers already had the theme chosen and were telling everyone what we would do. As I looked around the table, I could see it was not setting well with some of the moms... confusion... irritation... and three or four got up and left. One whispered to me it was obvious she was not needed.
Their ideas were good, but the way they were being presented could lead to friction. When they finished, one said, “Oops, we talked so long, no one else had a chance. Hope y’all like our plan!” I lingered after most left, and one asked if I knew why some left during the meeting.
Both ladies teared up when they realized that others thought they had “hijacked” the meeting and there was the potential for hard feelings. Their ideas had been very good, and “taking over” had not been their intent...they had just been together one day, and ideas began flowing, and they wanted to share them.
I told them they could count on me and suggested they call the other mothers and ask for suggestions and what they wanted to do to help. It was a progressive dinner, so there were four houses with different foods and decorations.
Our dinner was a wonderful success, and the kids loved it. It went smoothly because:
1. The two ladies made phone calls, apologizing for “taking over” in their excitement to share ideas.
2. Both “sides” stepped back and listened to the others.
3. No one made demands.
1 Corinthians 13:4 reminds us love does not insist on its own way.
Working in a group with others can be challenging, because of personalities involved. Some people just naturally take charge, and others prefer to sit back and do what they are assigned.
Working together means remembering Philippians 2:3, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.”
When we remember that whatever we do, we should “work heartily, as for the Lord, not for men” (Colossians 3:23), it makes keeping our eyes on the ultimate goal easier and provides for a smoother relationship within the group.
Let us enjoy the fellowship of working together, so Satan gains no foothold (Ephesians 4:27) in our relationships.