Written by Lisanka Martínez, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Venezuela
“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens a friend.” (Prov. 27:17 CEB)
We were created to be in relationships and to learn from those relationships.
It is undeniable that we are influenced by, and can influence the other people on our relational map. In this world, relationships are often complicated. Both in the family environment, as well as at work, in studies, and in the community, there will be differences, rivalries, and communication failures, among other things, that can make relationships complicated.
In the church body, we also learn about relationships, of course, with a different focus than the rest of the world. Once in Christ, even the most obstinate of human beings learns that we must love everyone, relate to all kinds of personalities, accept them, and treat them with love, as well as correct and be corrected with love. It is more difficult for some than for others. Depending on the temperament of each person, the change may be greater or less.
In my case, I grew up in a large family where most of them talked a lot, and with a loud and strong tone of voice. I, on the other hand, was quiet and limited myself to listening, expressing my opinion only if they asked me to. This distinguished me from others during my childhood and adolescence. I had few friends with whom I could express myself more openly; this caused some misunderstandings and embarrassing situations that only led me to become more withdrawn. Later, while I was studying Social Work, I began to express myself more in my relationships, both at school and with friends, but in my family relationships, I made little progress.
I learned a lot more about the exchange in relationships during my college years and in my working life. However, it wasn’t until I became part of the church that I learned so much more. I continue to learn about interpersonal relationships and the fact that God did not create us to be alone. His word says, “Two are better than one” (Eccl. 4:9 NIV).
When we are guided by the word of God and learn both from the examples of the relationships that had bad outcomes and from the ones that are good examples for believers, we can choose which path we will follow. When we understand the fruit of the Spirit and all that it generates in us, we will want to make an effort to develop it in our lives.
Likewise, when we see a brother or sister who, despite the adversities they are suffering, is ready to advise or help us, or when we understand that the sister who criticizes or judges also has faults and is as human as anyone, or when we see that sister who persists in her pride and maintains her opinions, believing herself to be wiser and less sinful than others (we may also see ourselves reflected in her conduct), we find that everything is part of God’s divine plan. Because we are blessed with His grace, every day we must try to keep the flame of brotherhood and friendship alive, despite our own mistakes or the mistakes of others. We learn that God's love is incomparable, and is what we must imitate, just as brother Paul advises when he says,
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus. (Phil. 2:3-5)
Let us try to achieve this in our relationships, not only with our sisters in faith, but also with each person who crosses our path and with whom we can share the glorious love of our Heavenly Father through the gospel of salvation along with a good deed or kind gesture.
Would you like to follow the example of our Lord Jesus Christ in His relationships?
What can we learn from each relationship with our brothers and sisters in Christ?
Are we applying that learning and that same attitude in our secular lives?
How can we improve our intra-family relationships?
May God bless us and help us reflect His peace and love every moment in all our relationships.
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