Written by Hasandra Heyward, Director of the Women’s Online Growth Group Ministry with which IRSM will partner on Tuesday evenings, starting March 22, to study Human AND Holy.
Last week a couple of my Christian sisters and I fasted and prayed together for a day. And for that day of deep intimacy with God and each other, it got me to thinking a lot about love. I believe the reason for this is because our time with God was really all about others. So, I began to explore in my mind how shallow our love for each other can be and how deeply penetrating the love of God is in our lives.
I must admit, I hear the words "I love you" a lot in my life. I hear it from my family, I hear it from friends, and I hear it from people who don't know me but whose hearts have been touched by His love that flows through me and its their sentiment towards me. Okay, I get it.
However, I have come to understand that what some call love, is not love at all; it's manipulation. I love you when you think like I do, speak like I do, look like I do; do what I want from you... I love you with deep levels of condition. And the moment you express your individuality or even your needs, those same people will siphon the very oxygen out of that "love" and deny you the very thing they know you need because it was never love at all. Hmmm…
Admittedly I don't want that kind of love. Proverbs tells us that fire tests the purity of silver and gold. Has your love been tested and if so, did it come out pure? I am a firm believer that love is what it does. "God so loved the world that He gave..."
What are you giving in your love relationships? Or, are you asking for everything and willing to give only in ways that are self-serving? I have come to learn that love has no loopholes... and as I delved deeper into exploring the ways we love within our imperfections compared to God's love and requirements, I was saddened by my own reality that I have never really experienced ALL.
Now right here you are probably thinking, "What is she talking about?" Ha! You know I am glad you asked right? I am talking about loving God with ALL your heart, and with ALL your soul and with ALL your mind. This lead me to ask myself what things do we need to give up to experience ALL... Is it pride? Is it anger? Maybe it's unforgiveness or perhaps jealousy? Is it a brokenness that has not been healed? Only you know what it is but I promise it is not worth robbing you of the opportunity to begin the journey of experiencing ALL. And I am convinced it's the key to that second and equally important command to love others as you love yourself.
Years ago, I heard Maya Angelou say "I don't trust people who don't love themselves and tell me "I love you."
There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt." I understand this more now today than when I first heard it. People cannot give what they don't have.
So, going back to loving God with ALL He gives exactly what He requires which allows us to give what is required of us to others. But if you are not truly loving Him, may I ask, from where does your love emanate?
If we ever hope to be made perfect in love and not be tormented by the conditions of worldly love, we must love God, we must love self, and we must love others (1 John 4:18-20). Think about what you need to give up to experience ALL—the things going on in our world are not the greatest tragedies. In my opinion, the greatest tragedy is not understanding and accepting the deep, beautiful, unconditional love of God and living that out each day in our own hearts and with each other.
Written by Hasandra Heyward, Director of the Women’s Online Growth Group Ministry with which IRSM will partner on Tuesday evenings, starting March 22, to study Human AND Holy.