Written by Eliuth de Valencia, volunteer with Iron Rose Sister Ministries in Colombia
“But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.
I will sing the Lord’s praise,
for he has been good to me.” (Ps. 13:5–6)
The challenge of balanced, Christ-centered parenting is not without its ups and downs. With three children, we have experienced difficult situations at the family level, wanting to always be obedient to God. Currently we still have two little ones under our care, with the definitive supreme calling to instruct and correct them with reverent fear of the Lord. However, we overlook some situations.
We took it for granted that talking about disability was enough to be conscientious with each other. Without realizing it, moved by the fragility and vulnerability of our youngest daughter, we made room for favoritism, putting aside our son's own needs. Thanks to the Lord who invites us to self-assess ourselves as parents, we were able to reconcile this misguidance and offer all our children equal love.
However, what seems to be a bad trend, gave us a great life lesson for more real evangelism: Life will not always be fair. There will be more disappointments and frustrations that you will experience throughout your life; people will have favorites, at school, at church; some classmates will take credit for something they didn't do; they will give the promotion they have worked so hard for to someone else. For decades, the world's most popular evangelistic message has been drawing people with the promise of God's wonderful plan for their lives. But behind the façade of the “wonderful plan” message is the reality of the trials, temptations, and persecution that Jesus promised (1 Pet. 2:21). How can we reconcile the two?
There is an absolute truth in the whole universe: God works all things according to His will, having control of all past, present and future events of our lives. We see this in the constant narrative throughout the second half of Genesis that aims to show one of God's attributes, His sovereignty.
God blessed the family of the promise. The many sons of Jacob show the beginnings of God's promise to make Abraham's descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky. Also, throughout the narrative, we are distracted by the fragility and humanity of each of its members from generation to generation. Despite this, God has purposes in their lives, but before using them greatly, he had to work on their character. This leads me to think that we do nothing to earn any of the goodness that He gives us, yet surely, He blesses our obedience. It is transformative to be shaped by trials even if the greatest challenge is to love others. This helps me find out if this common approach to the gospel fits with real life, and with the Scriptures.
Constantly, as a woman, I find myself struggling to understand these truths. My sinful nature is frightened, anxious about obstacles, and has a hard time resting in God. But something changes when I go to Him and He teaches me to understand that His time and His way of working are different from mine and that, at every step, His care will not depart from me, even in the hardest trials, allowing everything to work toward a perfect purpose.
There is a particular story that has given me lessons at every stage of life, and that I bring to my mind to understand and remember that God cares for His children fulfilling the purposes that He orchestrates in an extraordinary way; that is the story of Joseph (Gen. 30-50). I will highlight some aspects of this story:
Of the sons of Jacob, Joseph was God's chosen leader in his generation, and God revealed this calling to Joseph through dreams. Joseph was obedient to God and faithful with his responsibilities, honoring his father and doing what he asked. At that time, Joseph was still young, about seventeen years old, and lived in his father's house with many of his brothers.
Jacob favored Joseph, and this caused division in his house. Because of this, Joseph's brothers had their “it's not fair” moments seeing their younger brother being treated with blatant favoritism and living with the fact that their father clearly loved Joseph more. Furthermore, he was having multiple dreams indicating that one day the entire family would bow down to him. And while Jacob witnessed how parental favoritism (Isaac and Rebekah) destroyed his own family relationships (see Genesis 26), he practiced the same kind of behavior and produced the same kind of division among his children.
The brothers' hatred went unchecked and resulted in a horrible crime out of their frustrations. Their actions reveal the intense fighting and jealousy within Jacob's family; a scenario raised between their mothers (Leah and Rachel) who constantly competed. His brothers rejected Joseph, unaware of God's call on his life. Joseph's obedience and faithfulness contrast with the wickedness of his brothers when they conspired to kill him, sold him into slavery, and deceived their father (Gen. 37).
One cannot help but notice parallels between the stories of Jacob and Joseph:
- Jacob manipulated his brother for his birthright and then stole his blessing. Joseph's brothers tried to destroy the brother to whom the blessing belonged.
- Jacob was persecuted and deceived by Laban, and although Jacob was not innocent of the deception in his actions, God saved and protected him. Joseph was persecuted by his brothers who later deceived their father, but Joseph was innocent, and God was with him as well.
- Even after Esau wanted the death of his brother Jacob, we see God's mercy in giving Jacob a new name, Israel. With the burden of his previous actions towards his brother, Jacob wanted to repay producing a deep reconciliation. Joseph also reconciles with his brothers, “And now, do not be distressed and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you” (Gen. 45:5).
When you feel ignored, separated and defeated, remember Joseph as an "archetype" of Christ: who went from suffering to glory, becoming the savior of his brothers who had rejected him and left him for dead.
It does not have to be difficult. Work on the things you can change. Get closer to God, read His Word, strengthen your character, refine the gifts with which He has blessed you, and practice being faithful in difficult times—even the small and invisible ones shape you. God is working in our lives and situations. He is a God who sees, cares and is moving. We can see this in the life of Joseph and find encouragement for our own circumstances. No matter what we face today, we can demonstrate our faith by continuing to believe God's promises. God will continue to carry out His purposes. His faithfulness in the past is a model and a promise for His faithfulness in the future. It will keep working, even when we feel like we're in the pit. As the psalmist proclaimed, we can trust in His faithfulness and His coming deliverance, singing His praises when we are vindicated. One day you will be able to look back and see how God prepared you for something more than you could ever imagine.
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