Kim, please introduce yourself and tell us about your family.
My full name is Kimberly Faith Solis (previously Kershaw, but now married to Raul Solis). I consider myself from Portland, Oregon, though I have only lived there for 8 of my 48 years. I was not raised in the church, but came to Christ and was baptized the summer after my senior year of high school thanks to my best friend, who invited me to church.
Two years later I went through the Adventures in Missions program in Lubbock, Texas, and went to Toluca, Mexico, to work with the missionaries there for two years. Well, at least I thought it would be for two years, but it was there that I met my husband Raul! Three children and 25 years later, we have temporarily moved back to Oregon to take care of my mom and work on getting my husband’s US citizenship.
Our three kids are: Diego (age 23), Isaac (21) and Angie (19). Raul and I work for the Instituto Latinoamericano de Estudios Bíblicos (ILEB) in Toluca. We both write and teach courses and I manage the online learning platform for the Institute.
What does obedience mean to you?
Wow! This is a really huge question. I am learning that obedience is EVERYTHING. We often think that the goal in life is to be happy... we want to live “happily ever after.” But I have learned that our goal should be to simply be obedient, and let God work out the details of our joy (which is so much deeper, and not dependent on circumstantial happiness.)
I think obedience is doing what we know God wants us to do, forgive, love, accept, serve, even when we don’t understand why, don’t agree, or don’t even want to. It’s doing these things even when we think God is being unfair or too demanding. It’s trusting in His will and reason, and not in our own.
What has obedience looked like in your life?
I really have struggled with what to write and what to share. My road with obedience has been an interesting one, especially when doing what God says has not been easy. There are many people who hurt us in our lives. Perhaps they disappoint our expectations, they reject us or abandon us in times of need, or they don’t treat us as we should be treated.
In one such situation, I felt called to forgive someone who hurt me deeply in many ways. I felt the Word showed me to place the relationship in God’s hand, instead of taking care of matters myself in a vengeful way. This was hard. For years I struggled to forgive. What I really wanted was to separate this person from my life, but God kept our roads crossing, time and time again. I made a “deal” with God. I challenged God saying, “The only way I’ll let you continue to let him be in my life is if he becomes a Christian.”
God is amazing. He didn’t strike me down in anger. I believe he understood not only my broken heart, but also the broken life of this person and it wasn’t too long later that my husband baptized him into Christ! Now I had to keep my part of the deal. I finally thought I had forgiven only to find, a few years later, that I still harbored resentment and anger deeply buried in the recesses of my heart.
The culmination of my obedience came when this person became very ill. When I heard the diagnosis, my first reaction betrayed the truth I had tried to hide. “Finally! He’ll be gone,” I thought, and instantly felt guilty. I had obeyed faithfully throughout the years and allowed this person to continue to be a presence in my life, and yet I had not been able to do so completely with a forgiving heart. It was then that God began to challenge my willingness to truly obey, especially when it was extremely difficult to do so.
As his illness progressed, I went to visit this person and was presented with a difficult situation. The person who was taking care of him needed to step out and I was the only one there to help out while she was gone. God was asking me to serve him, to serve the one who hurt me, to obey His command to love... even our enemies.
To be honest, I didn’t want to do it. I even yelled at God in my heart, “You’re asking too much with this one! I don’t want to serve him.” But I knew I couldn’t say no, not to God. I bit my lip, held my breath and served... and something really amazing happened.
A couple of days later I was preparing to head home, he (who never expresses his emotions, who rarely really spoke about anything personal, and who had never said anything about what happened between us) looked me in the eye and said, “You really didn’t have to come.” I knew that behind those words was an apology for all the pain he had caused me, a thank you for never shutting him out of my life, an acknowledgement that, of all the people in the world, I was the last one who should be serving him in his time of weakness.
I left and got on a plane home, crying the entire trip. A tremendous weight was suddenly lifted off my heart. I no longer asked for his death, but asked God to spare him or to at least give him peace in his last months. I also sent word and asked someone to relay a message to him in case I didn’t get to see him again. I asked them to tell him that I forgave him, completely and sincerely. The message was given, and I was told he just wept like a baby. I did get to see him before he passed, but we did not have the chance to exchange words; he was not conscious enough to carry on a conversation. God even granted me my last prayer that I had said that day flying home, the tears washing all my anger away... I got to sit with him in his last moments, singing hymns and asking God to take him into His presence with mercy and love.
Several years have passed. I understand now that forgiveness is a road, sometime a very long one, but one that can only be traveled in obedience. I search my heart for any lingering anger or pain and only find sorrow—for the life that gave him such emptiness and desperateness for control, and for the impact that had on me and my family... and I also find a lot of peace.
Peace that only comes from God. Peace that surpasses all understanding.
And peace that only comes through obedience.
If I had not obeyed...
Vengeance is mine, says the Lord.
Forgive one another, as I have forgiven you.
Love your enemies. Serve one another.
Not my will, but yours be done.
I would not have found peace and healing for my soul. And for his.
Is there a Bible verse that encourages you about obedience? Or a Bible character you admire for his/her obedience?
Several. I think the main one is Hebrews 12:1-2:
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted.
I admire many Bible characters for their obedience... perhaps my favorite is Peter who, tired from fishing all night with no luck and then cleaning his empty nets, is told to row out to deep waters and cast once again. He must have thought Jesus was crazy. He must have thought it was a waste of time. He could have simply refused. But he didn’t. He trusted. He obeyed. (But at Your word I will let down the nets.) And, he reaped a great reward.
What most helps you be obedient?
Remembering who it is that is asking me. God is not just some human authority. God is He who knows all, sees all, and who loves me with His entire being. I owe Him everything. I cannot deny His will.
What most hinders you from being obedient?
Me. I hinder me. I am often too busy and distracted to hear His subtle voice and therefore I miss opportunities to obey. I have made a promise that when I feel nudged by His Holy Spirit, I will obey what I am being nudged to do, but I also have to keep my mind in tune to hearing those nudgings. That is hard to do if I am not communing with the Spirit daily in His Word and in prayer.
What blessings have you received through obedience?
So many! But, like I mentioned previously, the biggest has been the gift of true forgiveness and reconciliation before it was too late.